Waiting For My Oatmeal To Cool

My oatmeal is too hot. While I wait for it to cool down I thought I’d post to the ol’ blogaroo. I’d don’t really have anything to say, which should be obvious since I’ve chosen cooling oatmeal as today’s topic. Actually, some of my best posts have been when I have absolutely nothing of import to say. I think that says a great deal about the overall quality of “Philbertosophy”.

(Pause while oatmeal is tested.)

(OK, it’s just right, hold on, I’ll be right back… I really love my oatmeal.)

I think I know why I like oatmeal so much. I think it’s because oatmeal and I have a lot in common. We’re lumpy, half-deaf and have very little hair. We’re none too bright, either. But, we’re inexpensive and don’t usually cause much trouble. We’re both fairly innocuous residents of this spinning, blue orb we call earth. You have nothing to fear from me or my bowl of oatmeal.

I don’t think I’ll bring up this oatmeal analogy in my next “Employee Performance Evaluation”. I don’t think my supervisors would be able to grasp the subtleties in the comparison. Besides, if they find out a bowl of hot cereal can do my job then I’ll be out on my keister. If I don’t have a job, I can’t buy oatmeal. If I can’t buy oatmeal then Quaker Oats stock will plummet. If Quaker Oats goes teats up that could signal the great economic collapse we all fear. So, it’s probably best we keep this whole oatmeal thing to ourselves. I don’t want to be responsible for people wandering a barren landscape searching for grubs and potable water. Oatmeal is much better for you than grubs. I think.

Well, I have to go to work now, but I bet you thought I couldn’t do it — write an entire blog entry on oatmeal. What’s worse is that if you’re still reading this, you just spent three minutes of your life reading about my breakfast.

At least I have an excuse. I was waiting for my porridge to cool down.

Love & Smoochie-woochies,

Your Humble ‘Toonist,

Philbert Of The Lowered Cholesterol


Explore posts in the same categories: Thoughts & Musings

One Comment on “Waiting For My Oatmeal To Cool”

  1. Mark Schiller Says:

    Glad to hear you are such a Quaker Oatmeal fan. We appreciate your business.

    Mark Schiller
    Quaker Foods and Snacks

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